Day One - Taekwondo

"Today I am grateful for taekwondo.  For the sweat and the smell and the ability to feel comfortable in a body that works and does what I want.  For being able to train properly now that my foot has mostly healed.  For being fit enough to break a sweat but never be out of breath all the way through two hours of class.  For the flexibility to deliver one turning kick after another at my own head height and the power to knock over the tower when I do it.  For friends who understand my obsession and serve as my training partners, peers and teachers.  And for aviators which make me feel like a total bad arse when I limp barefoot out of the dojang with the most appalling sweat marks.  Today I'm grateful for taekwondo...passion and dedication."

I broke my foot training for NSW State Championships in November.  Since I break things a lot doing taekwondo, I didn't really think much about it - I just strapped it up with electrical tape* and kept training.

 That was a massive mistake.  A month later I had my gold medal for State and I was training for the lead-up to my first black belt grading.  I need four to qualify.  I was chewing anti-inflammatories, icing it, strapping it...but I could barely walk.  I needed time off.  I took a month as soon as I passed my grading.  It turned into six weeks.

My depression comes back when I don't train.  Training is my medication and my meditation.  My mind goes blank, I focus and my body flows.  I come off the dojang floor and I feel at peace.  Without it I go nuts.  Apart from missing the intensity there's also all the creeping fears and doubts.  Am I going to lose condition?  How much weight am I going to put on?  What happens if it doesn't get better?  How long is this going to take?

The first night back I had to sit out for the last ten minutes of class but I was elated.  It hurt but not anywhere near what it had - the deep ache of recovered injury being tested not the sharp bite of re-injury.  And I could do it.  I sweated but I wasn't out of breath.  The scales show some weight gain but doubtless it will come off fast when I'm back to full strength.  The first of 100 Happy Days.

*  Cheaper than athletic tape and comes off easily.